[S]ame [S]hit [D]ifferent [D]ay

Choices ppl make

2006-02-16T12:49:00.002+08:00

the whole of our lives, we make choices.. some good, some bad.. but no matter wat, good or bad choices u make, the ones that u regret making is the worse.. ever regret doing something and hoping to go back in time and change things.. haha.. sometimes i still do feel like tat.. regret.. ppl say that our lives are laid down in front of us and we jus have to keep walking forward.. detours and roadblocks along the way r jus challenges life gave us.. onli to make u stronger, or crush u in humiliation.. wat doesnt kill u onli makes u stronger..

but let me ask u this.. have u ever wanted to go back and change ur life? do u regret certain things u did in the past? wat do u now? move forward and forget abt it? or u do something to correct those things that u regret doing? which is better? to do or not to do??

as life moves forward, we grow older by the second and hopefully wiser.. but does life give u a second chance? a second chance to make things right.. wat do u do with that chance? and wat if there is no second chances? how do u live wif urself? life's kinda shitty if u think abt it.. the onli gd thing u noe is that each day u wake up, u have ur frens and family ard u hu gave u their support and love.. other than tat, u're on ur own..

ur mind is a complicated place to lose urself in.. wat ifs run about in ur mind.. wat if i did tat instead of this? wat if? wat if? tats wen regret sets in.. haiz..

i noe all these may not mean anything but it does to me.. piece of advice:

Live life to the fullest..
Live today like there's no tmr,
and plan ur life like u going to live forever..

Laterz.. outz..

Choices ppl make

2006-02-16T12:49:00.001+08:00

Choices ppl make

2006-02-16T12:49:00.000+08:00

the end is near

2006-02-15T12:32:00.000+08:00

3 more weeks, 6 papers and school's out. NS, werk.. we will be unfolding a new chapter in our lives.. friends will lose contact with each other, ppl will change.. kinda sad huh? haha.. i'll be werking while waiting for enlistment.. dun have any idea when tat is.. or where i'll be going.. anyway, had a nice conversation wif an old fren today.. and i realise that life is shitty wif all this responsibility and loyalty crap.. if only things were different.. haha.. maybe my life a little more colourful, or a little more worse.. haha.. we'll see how it goes.. to one and all, happy valentines day.. yesteraday..

Laterz.. outz..

half way thru

2006-01-12T15:26:00.000+08:00

its week 10 and we're half way thru our semester.. finally.. i can see the bloody finish line.. haiz.. been too long.. the books, the lectures, the tutorials, the practicals, the EXAMS!!! haiz... finally.. in a few more weeks, they are no longer my problems.. so damn happy..

got in contact wif an old fren today.. hadn't met in a long time, not to mention contact each other.. glad to hear from her.. brought back old memories.. onli to feel dread i didn't do anything in the first place.. guess god has a different purpose for all of us.. but it was nice to hear from my old fren.. :)

tmr got petrochemical exam.. damn.. too many things to remember.. hate it or love it, have to get thru unscathe.. hope so.. haha...

been thinking.. about my new year's resolution.. wats my frens' resolution i wonder.. hmmm..

i think mine would be to have ppl like to be ard me for a change.. i keep making ppl wanna distance themselves from me.. destined to be a loner? maybe.. but i certainly hope not...

to all, happy new year and good luck for 2006.. laterz.. outz..

wah lao wei.. dusty sia..

2005-11-06T15:52:00.000+08:00

*blow dusts away*

so long haven log in.. anyway, ITS RAYA BABY!! hehe.. to one and all, SELAMAT HARI RAYA AIDILFITRI.. to my frens, MAAFKAN AKU!!! to the rest, Maaf Zahir Batin.. busy man this year.. besides the lepak every night for puase, ah... hmmm... oh yeah.. preparations for raya and lots more.. this year my final year.. next year must start to give $$ to kiddies.. hehe.. sad.. *imagine money fly away*... sniff.. haha.. anyways, to one and all, enjoy the hols and hope to see each and everyone soon.. take care and slamat hari raye!!! laterz... outz..

CPTC

2005-10-11T10:32:00.000+08:00

been gone a while now.. 2 mths plus at CPTC.. JURONG ISLAND SIA!! haha.. been enjoying my stay here.. its ok.. but very leceh.. tired.. haiz.. bored like hell sometimes.. k la.. till next time.. outz.. laterz..

holiday retreat?

2005-07-15T22:34:00.000+08:00

got a job at world of sports at taka.. today was the third day there.. been fun.. learnt a lot of stuff.. earning at the same time.. better than any of my other jobs that i got last time.. haha.. ok la.. see ya.. laterz.. outz..

holidays.. i need to find work!!!

2005-07-10T01:24:00.000+08:00

having holidays can be fun, onli if u have things to do.. need to find work man.. haiz.. anyways.. went to marina south jus now.. had a picnic wif nadiana.. its ok.. i guess tats it for now.. see ya.. laterz.. outz..

wat a way to begin my holiday..

2005-07-07T00:18:00.000+08:00

got one month break.. went to go fnd werk today.. wan chinese la.. wan gerl la.. haiz.. applied at GV and Cineleisure Causeway.. dunno can get not.. haha.. den at night went to 211 as usual.. den, wow.. wat a call i got.. seems tat i dun care enuff.. haiz.. dun wanna go in details la.. jus sad at how i started my holidays.. haha.. k la.. laterz.. outz..

FINALLY!! DONE!!

2005-07-05T16:37:00.000+08:00

finish.. done.. tats all folks.. haha.. finish liao.. 1 mth break.. happy sia.. jus now david beckham came to campus.. packed man the atrium.. wanna go arcade buy stuff also cannot.. haiz.. haha.. so many screaming girls and guy?? haha.. ok la.. laterz.. outz..

second last day..

2005-07-04T13:52:00.000+08:00

tmr last day liao.. still got to finish up the report and the frontpage thingy.. haiz.. so many things to do.. bored!!! haiz.. time moving so fast.. most probably, this time next year, i'll be in NS.. haiz.. ok la.. laterz.. outz..

my back!!!

2005-07-03T15:41:00.000+08:00

my back's killing me man.. shit.. haiz.. since yesterday.. wanna enjoy also cant.. each time enjoy, confirm my back kena one.. pain man.. haiz.. sadded.. anyway.. next week last week.. hope i get the royal sporting house job.. need the dough.. ok den.. see ya.. laterz.. outz..

final week ahead!

2005-07-01T16:46:00.000+08:00

finally, its the last week of my final year project.. HAHAHAHAHA!!! HAPPY GILER!!! HAHAHAHA!!! its friday.. looking forward to the weekend.. haha.. hope i got the job at royal sporting house.. cross my fingers.. really enjoyed my time here.. twelve weeks of fun and laughter.. haha.. happy.. ok la.. going to city hall now.. buying some stuff.. laterz.. outz..

finish sia!

2005-06-30T14:44:00.000+08:00

finished my final presentation yesterday.. a big weight off my shoulders.. haha.. theeban got chicken pox.. and fever.. admitted into hospital.. going to see him tmr.. haha.. going to ben maniam's house to watch movie and lepak.. haha.. finishing my final year project next week.. power da.. haha..laterz.. outz..

Airborne Creed (A-team and Log book diff)

2005-06-29T01:17:00.000+08:00

A- team Airborne Creed. (on it's shirt)

I am Airborne trooper! A Paratrooper!

I jump by parachute from any plane in flight. I volunteered to do it, knowing well the hazards of my choice.

I serve in a mighty Airborne force-famed for deeds in war-renowned for the readiness in peace. It is my pledge to uphold it honour and prestige in all I am-in all I do.

I am an elite trooper- sky trooper-a shock trooper-a spearhead trooper. I blaze the way to far-flung goals-behind, before, above the foe's front lines.

I know that I may have to fight without support for days on end. Therefore, I keep my mind and body always fit to do my part in any airborne task. I am self-reliant and unafraid. I shoot true and march fast and far. I fight hard and excel in every art and artifice of war.

I never fail a fellow trooper I cherish as a sacred trust the lives of individuals with whom I serve. Leaders have my fullest loyalty, and those I lead never find my lacking.

I have pride in the Airborne! I never let it down.

In battle, I fear no foe's ability, nor do I underestimate his prowess, power and guile. I fight him with all my might and skill-ever alert to evade capture or escape a trap. I never surrender, though I be the last.

My goal in peace or war is to succeed in any mission of the day-or die, if need be, in the try.

I belong to a proud and glorious team, the Airborne the army, my country. I am its chosen pride to fight where others may not go-to serve them well until the final victor.

I am the trooper in the sky! I am the Nation's best! In peace and war I never fail.
Anywhere, anytime, in anything- I am Airborne!

Log book Creed

I am an Airborne trooper! A Paratrooper!

I Jump by parachute from any plane in flight.

I volunteered to do it knowing well the hazards of my choice.

I am an elite trooper, a sky trooper, a shock trooper, a spearhead trooper.

I blaze the way to far-flung goals-behind, above the foe's front line.

I never fail a fellow trooper.

I cherish as a sacred trust the lives of the men with whom I serve.

Leaders have my fullest loyalty, and those I lead will never find me lacking.

I have pride in the Airborne.

I never let it down!

I am Airborne!

i like the first one better.. more power.. haha.. jus a little something for u guys to read.. jus wanted to share wif all of u..

had fun..

2005-06-28T01:39:00.000+08:00

ben treated me, rehan and ian taufuku, haha, okok, taufik, to swensen's on sunday.. den coffee bean.. power da.. thanks man.. thanks so so much.. den met up wif nadiana.. walk2 den we go eat at newton circus.. full man the whole day.. haha.. den jus now we met up to go lepak together.. ended up i bought this Airborne shirt i always wanted and rehan bought this mind over body shirt.. power da.. haha.. worth the money man.. tats wat i think anyways.. den had dinner at beach road.. ben bought another pace stick for his unit.. 3 altogether.. ex man.. but super nice.. nadiana went to malaysia today, i mean yesterday.. hope she take gd care of herself.. wearing my new shirt tmr.. HAHA.. 49th instructors.. ALL THE WAY, DA!!

OMFG!

2005-06-24T11:57:00.000+08:00

rehan's suspended from NCC Day Parade! he's the bloody parade commander! if i ever found the f*cker who started all this, i'll f*cking kill him/her! i dun care liao.. its embarrassing enuff tat an investigation is being carried out.. its more embarrassing tat he has to be taken out of the rehearsals. it not fair man! shit! laterz.. outz..

heart and mind..

2005-06-23T12:21:00.000+08:00

the heart takes the mind on a journey of discovery.. to go where many may not.. or to where few wan to go to.. confusion.. hatred.. jealousy.. sins of life unfolds in the hearts of man.. a man pure of heart is hard to find.. but wat if circumstances in life prevents him from taking certain actions? wat if he has no hold over wat to doin his life? wat does he do then? hold on? let go? i have no answer to that question.. if u do, tell me.. but remember this.. if u say it as though its so easy, think whether if its tat easy.. weigh all the factors in and then tell mi ur answer.. laterz.. outz..

lost in confusion

2005-06-22T11:44:00.000+08:00

i have no idea if things would ever change for the better.. maybe life is designed in such a way tat u'll never get wat u wan but always get wat u need.. think abt tat.. laterz.. outz..

Wat am i to do?

2005-06-21T15:15:00.000+08:00

wat am i to do now? how can i ever be happy? 5 years.. wait for 5 years? i dunno.. please GOD, send me a sign to show me a path i can take.. please..

torn in two

2005-06-20T12:39:00.000+08:00

i'm confused.. my heart's torn in two.. wif a love i once had and one that juscame.. SHIT! FUCK! why me? why must i be put into this kind of position? why? SHIT! i hate this.. i wan it all to be easy.. not like this.. never like this.. i never wanted to choose.. i never did.. shit!

Booked out!!!

2005-06-18T15:24:00.000+08:00

booked out today.. the POP yesterday was fun.. seems they actually pulled it off.. haha.. had fun.. going out wif rehan they all today.. finaly get to see the outside world.. haha.. tell u more next time.. laterz.. outz!!!

bad to badder?

2005-06-16T09:19:00.000+08:00

went from bad to badder yesterday.. haha.. now, i noe more than ever that i have a close to zero chance of winning her back.. anyways.. had a parade rehearsal yesterday.. den slept at 1 am plus.. played "tai ti" or big 2.. lose got forfeit.. haiz.. lost twice.. sadded.. kena saboh.. haha.. sad man.. hope today gets better.. have another rehearsal tonight.. hope its better than yesterday.. haha.. well, see ya.. laterz.. outz..

Same Shit Different Day

2005-06-14T09:30:00.000+08:00

officers who dun wanna admit they are wrong.. cadets who think they are better den their instructors.. haha.. this is turning into a childcare centre.. haha.. missed her.. didnt call her or vice versa yesterday.. missed her a lot.. but now i try to give her wat she wants.. if she's not for me, then so be it.. if u love somebody, let them go, in time, if they return, its meant to be.. haha.. so it says.. haha.. see ya.. laterz.. outz..

Perfect World - Simple Plan

2005-06-13T10:32:00.000+08:00

I never could have seen this far
I never could have seen this coming
It seems like my worlds falling apart, yeah
Why is everything so hard?
I don't think I can deal
With the things you said
It just won't go away
In a perfect world
This could never happen
In a perfect world
You'd still be here
And it makes no sense
I can just pick up the pieces
But to you this means nothing
Nothing at all
I used to think that I was strong
Until the day it all went wrong
I think I need a miracle to make it through, yeah
I wish that I could bring you back
I wish that I could turn back time
Cuz I can't let goI just can't find my way, yeah
Without you I just can't find my way
In a perfect world
This could never happen
In a perfect world
You'd still be here
And it makes no sense
I could just pick up the pieces
But to you
This means nothing
Nothing at all
I don't know what I should do now
I don't know where I should go
I'm still here waiting for you
I'm lost when you're not around
I need to hold onto you
I just can't let you go
Yeah, yeah
In a perfect world
This could never happen
In a perfect world
You'd still be here
And it makes no sense
I could just pick up the pieces
But to you
This means nothing
Nothing at all
You feel nothing
Nothing at all
Nothing at all

BOOK IN!

2005-06-12T13:56:00.000+08:00

booking in tonight.. i keep thinking of amoy quee camp as a holiday from all the stresses of life but i forgot.. the cadets in there also give u as much stress.. sometimes more.. haha.. hopefully this week will be better den the last.. hopefully.. woke up late today.. going out later.. maybe alone.. jus dun wanna stay at home.. too much memoies held in my room.. cant take the heartache.. haha.. jus need to let go.. tats wat people say.. maybe.. one day.. maybe not.. at all... laterz.. outz..

patience..

2005-06-10T23:54:00.000+08:00

patience is a virtue.. but wat if u're patient for the wrong things? wat if being patients robs u of the life and happiness and joy that u deserve? wat do u do then? be impatient? be mad? many believe that good things happen to those who wait.. so that is wat i will do.. wait.. jus wait and see wat happens.. maybe one day, something good will happen.. anyways.. jus booked out today.. had fun in camp.. kinda stupid la.. the cadets are expecting too much yet they can't handle the simplest of instructions.. i'm about to explode at them.. hopefully i can take it.. laterz.. outz..

mistake

2005-06-09T22:07:00.000+08:00

i think i made a mistake.. i dun think i can get her back.. i'm alone now.. how? i cant.. i cant do this.. i'm at the end of the line.. i cant do this.. i'm about to snap.. why must it be me? have i not suffered enough? how long more till my heart can feel no pain? how long more will my heart be suffering? please.. i wan my life back.. i wanna be happy.. i wan to be happy once more.. please.. nadiana..

Operation Flying Eagle

2005-06-08T11:28:00.000+08:00

name given for army's so-called "propaganda".. show wat singapore did for the tsunami disaster that struck on 26/12/04.. small country, big heart.. haiz.. the CDT (cadet trainees) are going to PLAB for the presentation and its supposed to be a big event.. hmmm.. i not going anyways.. haha.. anyway, woke up late today.. hit the gym yesterday night.. strained my injury.. i woke up at 7 den ate breakfast den went back to sleep.. till 10.. haha.. stupid sia.. haha.. going back to camp later ard 5-6.. maybe can get some sleep before the cadets get back.. anyways, she called yesterday.. had a nice conversation.. hopefully things would improve.. think tat's it.. laterz.. outz..

49th CLT Course.. HAHAHAHA!!!

2005-06-07T09:35:00.000+08:00

49th CLT Course.. 70 cadets.. haha.. ridiculous.. its fun though being wif old frens and hanging out.. tekan them.. but they all ah.. sotong also not so blur.. its funny if u understand the system and commands.. haiz.. haha.. been rough this weekend though... but i came thru ok.. seems my luck's gonna change.. hopefully.. thought of the day.. put off today wat u can do tmr.. ;) laterz.. outz..

change..

2005-06-02T13:53:00.000+08:00

things change.. people change.. seasons change.. everything changes for a reason.. for better.. for worse.. change brings about the best and worst in a person.. but what makes u change? urself? another person? different people have different perspective of life.. wat one person thinks may not be wat the other is thinking.. change is normally good.. keeps us from getting bored.. makes us human.. but wat if people refused to change because they like the way their life is.. would u force them to change? wat if that happened to u? would u change if someone forced u to? to each their own and to change or not to change, that's the question and onli u have the answer.. laterz.. outz..

wat??!

2005-06-01T10:45:00.000+08:00

wat have i done wrong huh? fight wif u? this is not a fairy tale story.. this is not romeo and juliet.. this is LIFE! wat have i done wrong? u say i always cause trouble.. i pick the fight.. MY FAULT! EVERYTHING MY FAULT!!! EVERY BLOODY THING IS MY F*CKING FAULT!! UR THE ANGEL WAT! NEVER DID ANY WRONG! ME! ME! ME! ALL ME! EVERYDAY I WAKE UP FEELING EMPTY INSIDE. EVERYDAY I CAN'T SLEEP AT NIGHT. MY FAULT?! YES! U LEFT. MY FAULT?! YES! ALL MY MISTAKES?! YES! WHO IN THIS BLOODY GODDAMNED PLACE IS SO BLOODY FUCKING PERFECT?! HUH?! NO ONE!! NOT EVEN YOU! U ARE BLOODY LUCKY AH TAT I'M NOT ONE OF THOSE TYPICAL MAT WHO TAKE WAT THEY WAN AND LEAVE U TO ROT! APPRECIATED?! NO! FUCK! FUCKING HELL! SHIT! WHY ME?! WHY BLOODY HELL ME?! FUCK!

midweek..

2005-06-01T08:46:00.000+08:00

its jus a wednesday.. haiz.. too long la.. week 7 of my fyp.. hope can finish up everything.. haiz.. wish everything will go back to normal.. hope that she finds happiness.. dream of a better place and life in the future.. haha.. heart pain.. haha.. laterz.. outz..

today..

2005-05-31T11:54:00.000+08:00

saw her today.. on the train on the way to school.. she wif her 'fren'.. asked me why i walked away.. jus told her i didnt wanna harass her.. seems i've been doing jus tat.. stupid huh.. i mean me.. i'm stupid.. nvm.. hope the rest of today doesnt suck like the starting of it.. haiz.. laterz.. outz..

frens..

2005-05-30T10:16:00.000+08:00

its funny how life lets u meet people wif different perceptions of life.. some may take life slow and easy, others stress up at every single small matter.. haha.. its funny but these things are the memories and moments that make life colourful.. make it more worth living.. to all my frens.. thanks for coming into my life.. to the people i'm going to meet in the future.. hope to see ya soon.. to my frens and family.. love ya guys.. see ya.. outz..

bothered?

2005-05-27T13:13:00.000+08:00

seems i've been bothering a lot of ppl.. guess so.. its ok.. i'll jus revert back to my old self and bottle everything up like usual.. haha.. ppl should not be scared of the devil they see on the outside, they should fear the devil thats inside us all..

FUCK!

2005-05-26T15:54:00.000+08:00

FUCK! SHIT! S.O.B! this is the first time kena scold for a presentation. FUCK! WTF! damn it!

SHOUT OUT!!

2005-05-26T12:27:00.000+08:00

finally got my own shout box.. haiz.. very long time ah? haha.. wat to do.. very busy man.. haha.. ;)

wats the right thing to do?

2005-05-25T15:02:00.000+08:00

usually, wats the right thing to do is normally the hardest.. the only thing that u hope u need not do.. but thats the onli way out.. the onli way to go.. there's no other choice.. but yet, u cant do it urself.. haha.. i doubt that all of u understand wat i say but.. nvm.. laterz.. outz..

cuts..

2005-05-24T14:54:00.000+08:00

wtf is happening? why all this? i dunno la.. FUCK THIS SHIT!!

FRIDAY!!!

2005-05-20T11:27:00.000+08:00

woke up kinda early this morning.. haha.. finally? maybe.. its also a friday.. enjoy the weekend.. long weekend some more.. haha.. anyways.. kinda disappointed and sad yesterday.. really lost at wat to do.. dunno wat to do anymore.. haiz.. sad.. its ok la.. my life's like this.. wat to do?? told me its all my fault.. ok la.. i get it.. i'm not good enough.. haha.. laterz.. outz..

wat do u wan me to do?

2005-05-19T15:22:00.000+08:00

i dunno wat to do anymore.. haiz.. tried my best.. wat do u wan me to do? who do u wan me to be? won't return my calls.. won't reply my messages.. won't answer my questions.. wat do u wan from me? i dunno ok!!!

now den i get my pay..

2005-05-18T14:25:00.000+08:00

finally, after so long.. 3 days le.. den i get my pay.. STUPID!! need the cash man.. haiz.. now den get..idiotic!! actually.. later den going down to office to take the cheque la.. not now.. hehe.. i think i better go now.. hehe.. see ya.. laterz.. outz..

change..

2005-05-17T13:56:00.000+08:00

wat is change? to be diferent from wat u are now? to make things better in life? different people have different views on wat change is.. to change, to me, is to strive to be something better than wat u are now.. to open more doors of opportunity to a better future.. to this i say to all of u.. try something tat u normally won't do.. do things tat would improve ur life.. tat is how u will find out tat there are better things out there for u.. even if those things may not be good, u'll learn a valuable lesson on life.. if u dun try, u won't noe.. if u keep going thru the same door each and every single time, u'll end up in right back where u started.. laterz.. outz..

wat have i become?

2005-05-16T17:32:00.000+08:00

i'm in the comp lab now.. all went off already.. listening to some music.. thinking.. wat have i become? i'm not trying to put myself down or anything.. it's jus that it already has happen.. i dunno.. why do i put myself in this position? fate? destiny? maybe.. ppl say that they are the masters of their own destinies.. are u? think abt it.. are u in total and absolute control.. each day we are controlled by things that may seem normal.. controlled by work.. controlled by the clock.. controlled because we must obey our parents.. anyone who says that u are not controlled by anything, i say to u that u are wrong.. somehow, u are controlled by something or someone.. and u can do anything to help it.. so wat i am now is because i choose this path.. and because this path was laid for me.. hoping is a good sign.. a good sign that u wanna change the path u are traveling now.. but noe this.. the next 'new' path u take, has been laid out for u in advance by someone or something else.. some ppl say its the ppl ard u.. others say it was planned by a greater being.. believe in wat u wan.. believe in urself.. and live life to the fullest.. beacuse at the end of the day, its still ur life.. u live it.. not anyone else.. dun ever regret the decisions u make.. take care my frens, family.. laterz.. outz..

hmmm.. cheque pls..

2005-05-16T11:47:00.000+08:00

getting my pay either today or latest on wednesday.. still not sure of the amt but i can safely say its more then i ever made elsewhere.. had a funny weekend.. went to office.. funny thing is, unlike the other times we had an express plan to go for, this time we weren't pushed or stressed up to complete the plan.. hmmm.. oh well.. been a while since i went to the esplanade.. went there yesterday jus to relax.. me, fairuz and haziq were kinda stress.. kinda.. so we decided to hang out at esplanade.. there was this band that was playing, alternative genre.. i guess they were ok.. except for the vocalist.. maybe it was the mike but i could barely hear the lyrics.. its ok.. had a nice time there.. jus wanted to de-stress tats all.. anyways.. take care ppl.. laterz.. outz..

Sayang.. Nadiana..

2005-05-13T15:21:00.000+08:00

I LOVE YOU!!!

NADIANA..

Since i met u, i keep falling..

Been falling for a very long time..

Day by day keep falling for u..

I'm yours for life..

I LOVE YOU!!!

STRESS!!

2005-05-13T14:42:00.000+08:00

went to the office yesterday.. got a new plan for us.. need to reach a certain amt to get promoted.. den at tat stage can fight for car liao.. haiz.. who dun wan sia? FREE CAR!!! haiz.. it will be jus as long as no seniors followed us for appt.. haha.. tat would be fun.. haha.. anyway.. hope i can straight fight to reach manager.. haha.. SUPER-PART-TIME Manager.. hahahahaha.. achievable.. but damn hard.. haiz.. sadded.. haha.. everything in life now seems fine.. YEAH RIGHT!! got an ex who doesn't even.. got parents who always.. got management who are like.. haiz.. too bad i'm not living in a perfect world.. tat would be fun.. boring but at least no problems.. these so called 'challenges' really stinks.. if onli.. if onli.. if onli everything was so damn freeking easy.. haha.. easier man.. now.. jus have to tahan.. hope for the best and maybe something will come out of it.. hopefully.. hopefully my boss won't call me bloody shit before i go and collect my cert.. haha.. ok la.. laterz.. outz..

work..

2005-05-12T12:25:00.000+08:00

thursday's here.. one more day peeps.. anyways.. i opened up my blog at home and it seems there's something wrong wif it.. so, if there is any kind soul out there that would help lil' old me, please do.. a million thanks.. anyway, i'm supposed to report to work today.. my director wans to see us.. another plan? bet it is.. anyway.. as it has been everyday, i miss her.. haiz.. today no mood to write long long la.. damn cold.. wake up already raining.. so i went back to sleep.. woke up ard ten to eleven plus.. haha... ok la.. maybe i'll add another post later.. maybe.. laterz.. outz..

do u noe wat its like?

2005-05-11T16:40:00.000+08:00

do u noe wat its like to live in another's shoe? to live their life.. to experience and feel everything? no.. no one does.. funny isn't it.. if only tat could happen.. den we won't have ppl hurting us.. we would jus change places wif them.. see how they like it.. haha.. oh well.. anyways.. its been useless to message, call or watsoever.. for all i noe, there may already have been another guy.. oh well.. tough luck farhan.. haiz.. today was ok.. watched the french version of Taxi.. 101% better than the american version.. did our project and other stuff also.. meeting mr thomas later.. he's one of my company's managers.. he's the best amongst them.. shane may be chio.. but damn her attitude sucked.. ace is jus plain ok.. kena pressure by shane so wat to do.. overall, i like working there.. its been fun.. jus wan the other aspects of my life to be the same.. haiz.. anyways.. hope this month would bring better fortune, wealth and good health to ME.. and the rest of us of course.. hmmmm.... my mind blank.. hmmmm... ok la... later.. outz..

TOO LONG!!!

2005-05-11T11:54:00.000+08:00

its jus before noon.. woke up late today.. nothing unusual abt tat.. ever since i started school i've been waking up late.. haiz.. den i'll be like damn lethargic.. haiz.. yesterday was a little f up.. there were these group of underaged mats and minahs at 211.. they were there for onli 3 day already wan to cause trouble.. i admit tat my frens are sometimes hot headed but tat does not excuse those KIDS to act irrationally.. IDIOTS!! so the day before, they all kena 'scolded' by my fren.. HAHAHA.. BODOH! den yesterday they all were seen under block 210.. keep making noise and everything.. den one of the minahs go and 'complain' to her godbrother tat we scolded them.. and the godbro was a mat moto.. hahahaha.. damn suitable.. see whether there is any change today.. haha.. ok.. enuff abt tat.. in other news.. ahhh... oh yeah.. y do girls like to hurt their guys ah? first say they love us.. den say they dunno wat love is.. den say they love us and miss us and everything.. haiz.. complicated la.. nothing a little more easier ah? give us a break! we jus love u and there is no BUTS abt it.. anyways, this jus in.. naz kentut lagi.. say he going KL yesterday.. say him online at ard 2.. ohk.. maybe he go at night la.. den torn at KL den come back today.. haha.. dier kentut lagi.. To Kentut, jgn buih org lagi.. something bad is bound to happen to ppl of ur character.. seriously.. well.. tats it for now.. later.. outz..

JUST TUESDAY???!!!

2005-05-10T10:54:00.000+08:00

oh man.. one day jus passed.. this is going to be a very long week.. my supervisors out on leave and on course.. so.. lucky for me and ariff.. FREEDOM!!! but... ahhhhhhh... wat the heck are we supposed to do again??? oh well.. i'll think of something.. maybe watch movie.. maybe play games.. i'll figure something out.. anyways.. have u ever wondered why mums jus cant stop nagging at us? is it because we are always so prone to do something wrong? or is it because they jus like the sound of their naggy voice? who noes.. anyways.. hope my situation gets better.. getting rougher by the sec.. I NOT ELIGIBLE ENOUGH IS IT??? hehe... and the crowd goes "YESSSSSSSSS!!!!!" tats wat i think anyways.. haiz... wat to do.. i'm pessimistic.. ummmmm... hmmm.. my mind blank liao... laterz... outz...

i.. love.. thee..

2005-05-09T16:00:00.000+08:00

i quit being like this.. treated like trash.. treated like i dun exist.. i dun understand it noe.. give everything and get nothing in return.. ask for something in return, get scolded.. ???? i dun understand girls man.. wat do they wan from us guys? love? loyalty? frenship? money? wat? give me a clue.. i dunno.. jus one tiny little clue to help me out?? please.. haiz.. if onli.. is there a book out there on how to deal wif girls? how much? i'll pay that amt man if there was a book.. girls dun understand guys.. guys dun understand girls.. guys love their girls.. except for those exceptional few.. other than tat, we love our girlfriend very much.. wat i wanna noe is how can a girl make a guy go crazy and break his heart again and again even when he keeps coming back to her.. even when he loves her dearly.. is it a favourite pastime for u girls to break our heart? jus wondering.. i've been hurt a lot.. some ppl i noe are in the same position.. but y would u girls ditch us like second-hand toys, "rubbish", "trash", jus like tat.. y? more space? more time? need to think? wanna be alone? wanna study first? wan to have career first? wat? excuses.. all the same excuses girls use because they jus got tired of the same old boring shit.. namely.. us guys.. once a new toy comes along.. there's a 99.99% chance of u being dumped.. and even if its for a simple reason like she wanna be alone.. dun believe her.. she's jus sick of u.. u are nothing to her.. she can get any guy she wans and u cant do a damn thing abt it.. its a shitty world.. yeah.. i noe.. so wif everything shitty happening ard us.. to that, i say I QUIT! i didn't mean quit loving the girl.. i mean quit having a heart.. having a heart longing for the girl that's not coming back till kingdom come is not going to be of any use to anyone.. throw away any feelings u might have.. but still love her.. she once said.. wat is love? wat is love to her? wat is love to me? love to me is to hear her laughter when i'm down and laugh along because it warms my heart.. love is missing her smile during the loneliest nights.. love is missing her hug when u didn't do well in that test.. love is not giving up.. that ladies and gentlemen.. that is love.. to love may be the greatest feeling anyone may feel.. but not to love is a waste of ur existance.. so think for urself.. wat is love to u? love her because she's beautiful is not love.. its infactuation.. love her because she is the best kisser is not love.. its lust.. but love her because she's ur bestest fren. someone u can talk to and always be there for u and vice versa.. thats love.. sappy as it may seem.. i still love her.. i dunno if she noes this but i still very much love you nadiana.. i jus regret not doing the right things to make u stay.. to make u continue loving me..

I'M SORRY!!!

ladies and gentlemen

2005-05-09T11:15:00.000+08:00

why does this have to happen? have u guys ever wondered why things dun come so much easier? is it because victory would be much sweeter? yeah right.. that may be true but the journey sucked.. give us a break.. we've toiled.. we've tried.. what else do u wan us to do? what else do u wan me to do? come up to u in a white horse in shining armour and sweep u off ur feet to a faraway castle and live happy ever after? this is not a fairy tale LADIES.. this is reality.. no horses to come up to u wif.. no castle to live in.. u wan HDB have.. the onli horse ard here is a ferrari and even tat is close to impossible to get.. so girls.. give ur guys a break and let loose for a while.. he's worked hard to please u.. dun be upset everytime he does something wrong.. think.. all those times u're not upset is when he's doing something right.. so appreciate him.. and guys.. appreciate ur girl.. i didn't.. according to her.. and i lost her.. and i'm lost without her.. take care ppl.. later.. outz..

wasted!

2005-05-06T11:46:00.000+08:00

wasted man.. haiz.. if onli.. haiz.. wasted.. hate the feeling of "wat if?".. haiz..

WTF!

2005-05-06T10:10:00.000+08:00

noe something.. some things are best left undisturbed.. the seminar sucked.. idiotic.. ass.. wtf.. hated every minute of it.. wat a waste of my time.. oh yeah.. said wat? u'll be there for me no matter wat? yeah right.. yesterday night sucked.. can bet u tonight is no better.. have to go to the office today.. shit.. confirm got some shit happening tonight.. f***! one day.. one fine day.. U WILL ALL PAY! u think tat life's so damn fucking easy? BULLSHIT! u'll get wats coming to u.. care for u u treat me like shit! treat me like a piece of trash.. all tat time i worried abt u.. all the times i did things for u.. woke up early to send u to work.. all for nothing.. no appreciation watsoever.. dump me when something better comes along.. u think u'll be forever happy wif ur fens, think again.. u'll all get it.. i promise u.. till my last breath, i'll make sure that each and everyone of those people who crossed me will pay.. u think breaking hearts is fun? i'll crush urs.. later.. outz..

Seminar? Wat seminar?

2005-05-05T17:27:00.000+08:00

going to my company's seminar later.. got some stupid award to receive.. keep saying i miss being 1st by a little bit.. watever shit la.. dun give a f***.. aniways.. had a nice day today.. cool and relaxing.. no stress.. miss her though.. hoped she did well for her last paper.. although she may not noe it.. i miss her.. even if she doesn't care.. or have the same feelings.. my life's been off track for too long man.. longer than i wanted it too be.. the guys meeting naz today.. hopefully.. did a prank on him yesterday and a couple of days back.. haha.. hilarious.. haha.. hope everything goes well later.. hope everything goes as i plan.. well... to her, i love you.. miss u a lot.. gila bayang as i may be.. but i jus can't love anyone else but u.. to the rest of my frens.. hope u all get wat u all want.. if not, jus hang on man.. good things come to those who wait.. till later.. see ya.. outz..

FINALLY!!!

2005-05-04T10:09:00.000+08:00

another day to remember.. jus finish our last month's sales.. no results so far but i dun care.. the products beneficial.. but if people cant afford, i dun push.. makes for bad relations.. screw wat the AMs say.. i do things my way.. nadiana say that that is not a good salesman make.. but wat if i could break away from the norm and be successful without stepping on anyone's toes.. den everyone's happy.. no matter wat, if i can change to turf holdings, i will.. results are out and here's where i stop wif tat.. haha.. no comments..hopefully a new day would bring something new but i dunno.. my case for same shit different day keeps repeating itself.. hopefully not today.. jus wan my life to go back on track.. SOON!! i hate all this confusing shit.. haha.. later.. outz..

Another day.. Just like any other..

2005-05-02T00:42:00.000+08:00

what started out to be a day of days.. turned out to be jus like any other.. tasks were given for me and haziq to complete.. difficult as those tasks may be, it jus got harder.. wat task u may ask.. sorry.. cant tell u.. anyway, life has its purpose in putting u in particular situations that may not even seem sensible to u.. but wat could u do abt it? my answer to that, ladies and gentlemen, is NOTHING! u go thru life as though everything seems so easy until u hit the wall, no pun intended.. and the reason why these things happen? to make us learn.. we won't be the person we are now if we did go thru all those hard times.. take for example, the time u really had a crush on this guy/girl and she rejected u.. there's a lesson to be taught there.. to either perservere, to strive on to woo her/him, or jus to plain leave.. it also teaches us that everything in life is not so simple.. a perfect world would a damn boring place to live in.. so for those of u who are down and out like how i usually am most of the time.. a piece of advice.. live life to the fullest.. should u not be around tomorrow, make sure that everything u have done in the time u've spent here on earth, was worth it.. if u're with that someone special, cherish them for they may not always be there.. dun ever take things for granted.. say u love them each and every single day.. trust me, u won't regret it.. treasure life and watever may come ur way.. for now, at this very moment that u're reading this, u are loved by someone out there.. some u may noe, some u may not.. for watever comes tomorrow, may not be as good as today.. to all my frens.. fendy, jan, rafi, mizi, fir, syafiq, syam and for the rest of u guys who i didn't mention.. i love u guys man.. u people are the ones that add colour to my life.. to my family member.. i love you.. and to Nadiana.. no matter wat happens.. no matter wat.. i'll forever love you.. u give me strength.. u give me hope.. i'm sorry to all those that i've hurt before and i'm sorry mostly to my parents for my past bad behaviour.. and i'm sorry nadiana.. for.. for not helping to make ur life better.. last but not least.. guys and gals.. plan ur life as though u're going to live forever.. live life today as though u're going to die tomorrow.. see ya.. outz..

same shit

2005-04-29T17:18:00.000+08:00

here again.. waiting for a reply or anything for that matter.. jus a sign.. tats all.. nothing much.. jus something.. anything.. jus contact me!!! i noe i have not been the best of guys out there.. but i'm very much trying to be.. why is it always like this.. i'm the one who's.. i guess she noes but jus doesn't bother.. say i coop her up.. never give her freedom and space.. never let her be wif her frens.. i dunno.. i'm going crazy!!! pls la!!! sorry guys.. jus a little too much stress wif work and school and her.. now finishing up in school.. enjoy the coming long weekend.. see yaz... ciaoz..

Friday blues

2005-04-29T11:09:00.000+08:00

Friday's here and the long weekend awaits.. met her yesterday.. had a nice time.. missed her so much.. wat to do.. life's like tat sometimes.. so near yet so far? maybe.. maybe not.. too many things on my mind.. too many questions.. too many tasks.. hope i can cope.. anyways, got a new skin for my blog.. simple.. jus the way i like things.. too much excitement may prove to be too much for some people.. oh yeah.. for those of u who have not heard, there's this comedy clip called Russell Peters.. go and download from www.toastedbrownie.com.. i think that is the correct link.. haha.. well, hope u guys could give me more suggestions for my blog.. any comments appreciated.. till later.. see ya.. outz..

SSDD

2005-04-28T17:03:00.000+08:00

coming to the end of the second week of final year project.. still got ten more to go.. haiz.. very the bored.. better still, message no reply.. call never pick up or return.. jus my luck.. tot i could count on the person.. guess not.. got frens that gave better treatment, got people ard the person who could care more.. nothing i could provide.. drowning in my own sorrows? yeah.. maybe.. surely.. but wat am i to do in this kind of situation? jus tahan and hope things would work out? maybe.. dunno for how long.. till i'm 25? 35? 45? haha.. we'll see how it goes ladies and gentlemen.. maybe things would be better in the future.. every cloud has a silver lining.. the feeling of warm, comforting sunshine after a nasty storm.. but when will this storm end? not anytime soon i was told.. not anytime soon unfortunately.. have u ever needed someone so bad it hurts? feeling sucks i noe but wat to do? things ain't getting any better.. i was told that everything i did was wrong.. really? i dunno.. not mature.. not responsible.. psycho? hahaha.. i dunno.. there's too many thing in my head and mi heart that needs to be let out.. maybe one day.. till that day comes, here's a piece of advice to my frens.. dun think that wat u have now won't be taken away from u.. u have to work hard to make things happen.. till tmr.. see ya.. outz..

its been too long

2005-04-28T11:58:00.000+08:00

back again.. haven blogged in some time now.. dunno how to use so got tired of it.. now got fyp, so this really passes my time.. need more help wif this blog.. anyway, single again.. she needed "time" to be "alone". definition of alone is ONLY YOU AND NO ONE ELSE! being wif your frens is NOT "ALONE"! stress wif project, her, parents.. haiz.. cobaan!! anyway, the funny thing is, she still loves me but wans to be alone.. haiz.. girls are so fickle minded.. haiz.. see yaz.... outz...

why do i feel the way i do??

2004-07-28T23:35:00.000+08:00

another day passes like the gentle breezes u feel at the beach... nice feeling isnt it?? NOT!!! as more days passes, i fear the future... wat the next day might bring.. good or bad.. is it bad to feel the way i do? i noe there is something missing within me.. but i'm not sure whether i am the cause of such a feeling... of my own doing... or is it because i'm led to feel this way.. lead by my selfish heart.. my mind is spinning round and round.. i'm in a state of confusion.. in a state i used to be in but i forgot abt.. now it comes to haunt me.. wat have i done?! did i open pandora's box? did i do something unimaginable?? if i did.. wat is it?? someone tell me.. please.. i wonder sometimes whether i have a specific role on earth.. in this world... all i have ever felt is pain.. anguish.. sorrow.. ppl wan me to be more mature.. are they themselves?? and who is to judge u abt being mature?? u? me? my answer is... NOBODY!!! who in this god-damned place gives u the right to judge me!!! for those of u who may be reading this and have no idea wat i'm writing, i apologize.. its for those ppl who understand.. anyway, in my own eyes, in my own heart, i feel a different way.. i feel like a devil lives inside me.. a devil tat over time... i become... i dunno who i am anymore.. why do i feel this way??? how i wish i didnt have a heart... at least i would feel this pain inside me!!! haiz... i guess tats it... hopefully i live long enuff to write another post... jus joking... hehe... see ya...

MOVIE REVIEW (I, ROBOT)

2004-07-24T23:02:00.000+08:00

had training today at amkss.. den after tat met nad.. love u dear..

well, we watched i, robot at shaw at bugis... fantastic movie...

Will Smith certainly does deliver in this movie.. from the beginning to the end, the movie keeps u guessing who the real culprit really is.. the graphics were magnificient and the plot was better den some other movies i've seen recently... (e.g King Arthur)

well, this is certainly one movie i didnt regret watching.. really worth the eight bucks.. 31/2 out of 5 stars man... ciaoz...

why???

2004-07-22T00:05:00.000+08:00

everything went as normal today.. class was boring.. meals were the same things again because no money..den had to wait for training to start.. haiz... boring...

during training... or before tat.. i dunno la... i dun quite like the newbies.. not all but one.. no need to noe who la... very the noisy one.. buay tahan man..

last time we all, the seniors and my batch clicked... its good tat the new batch also click... but wat i realise is tat if ur skin is brown or any other colour den yellow, u can forget abt being treated nicely... guys ok.. but the girls ah.. terrible..

den training ended.. our couch dunno why today, he happy man.. haha.. very rare... once a leap yr like tat.. haha... anyway, after tat, my life returned to me..

all i can say is tat i cant control everything tat happens on earth.. in my life.. its the same shit everyday.. do something get scolded... dun do it also get scolded.. say i not gentleman, not mature and wat else.. I'M NOT PERFECT OK!!! but i'm doing my best to be wat u picture me to be.. i'll try.. i'll do my best... i promise u...

well.. wat to do.. wat to do.. same shit different day.. but i still love it.. haha.. ironic isnt it... :)
tats my life for u.. take a big step in and enjoy the ride... haha.... till next time.. ciaoz...

another FINE day...

2004-07-20T22:12:00.000+08:00

another day... another night... wat am i? who am i? i keep thinking of how or wat i'll be if i do this or if i didnt... am i tat bad?

the answer is well, unfortunately, YES!!!

can't help it but, yes, i'm a very bad person.. to my frens, my family and my gerl.. u may think i'm being too hard on myself or i'm jus saying the truth.. but i really dun care.. the onli person who i listens to and care for is always upset tat i'm not the person i should be...

sound's confusing? it is... and it gets even more confusing when u're in my shoes..

but life's never fair and all u can do is jus bite ur lip and get on with it.. the most u can do is do the singaporean thing to do... COMPLAIN!!

but to who u ask??? i dunno the answer to that question myself..

wat the hell am i on earth for anyway??? to be hurt?? to hurt ppl i love???

if u think this entry is weird, i feel wierder.. i dun understand my life anymore den anyone could understand y bad things happen to good ppl and vice versa..

dun ask me y i write this shit coz basically, i dunno myself...
haha.. yeah again... i dunno...

to my dearest love.. if u ever do get to read this, always noe that no matter wat, i still love u the way u are..

p.s. i wish my life gets back on tracks soon.. its been off track for as long as i can remember.. hopefully, everything would change soon.... peace guys... outta here...

2004-07-19T23:18:00.000+08:00

NCC Day Parade 2004
hansem not??? lol
My first and last time i command a parade... haiz...
a day i will always remember...

My parade... [NCC Day Parade 2004]

2004-07-19T14:31:00.000+08:00

To all of u who witness the parade at SAFTIMI yesterday.. thank you.. and to all those ppl who participated in the parade.. well done guys..

yesterday i had my parade.. i was the parade commander and i am so lucky to have my frens, family there to witness the event.. the feeling of commanding the parade in front of ppl who mean a lot to me, made me so confident of myself..

the parade started with the normal formalities.. the parade rsm marched in the right markers and then Eugene took over.. he's the parade 2IC.. the marched in the supporting contingents and then, it was my turn.. i took over the parade and from that moment on, the whole parade depended on my not screwing up.. haha... and luckily, i didnt... thank God i didnt.. after the parade, my instructors from Parachute Training Wing from Commandos put up a parachute display for the crowd... Fantastic!! then there were my frens who repeled from the grandstand, juma, PDS and NCC Air's flight display wif the line control models.. well done ladies and gentlemen...

yesterday was one of the most memorable days of my life... and i would always remember the ppl who made it happen... my frens, RSM, and all the support and confidence my girl gave me and to everyone else... i did it... WOOHOO!!!

2004-07-17T14:38:00.000+08:00

Dining In 2003
Farhan and Fazli
I'm the one in blue... DUH!!!

my first jump!

2004-07-17T13:50:00.000+08:00

started mi own blog today... wat to say... oh.. yeah...

i jus jumped of a plane at 1000 feet and parachuted down yesterday... the freedom of flight.. my worries.. my fears... all disappear from the time the jump door opened..

the most fantastic thing that could happen to someone.. made me realise how important ppl are.. up there.. i was in control of my life.. it all depends on me whether i landed dead or alive..

FANTASTIC MAN!!!

Airborne! ALL THE WAY, 176 BAC! AIRBORNE!